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Some of the symptoms are similar, sure.
Bipolar disorder is such a different beast. It's FOREVER.
With postpartum depression, you're expected to get better. To once again be whole. There's no set time limit but it does happen. You do get there.
I will be Bipolar for the rest of my life. The cycling, the depression, the highs, the mania, the shopping sprees, the hypersexuality....all of this is a completely different disorder. A different illness.
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I'm not saying we can't be friends because we're on opposite ends of the mental illness spectrum. I'm simply pointing out the fact of the matter. There is a difference.
But we can still survive. We can threaten to be "done". We can say shit we shouldn't on the internets. It's not a cry for help. It's not an attention seeking moment, trust me.
It just is what it is in that moment.
I am glad to see you are still writing on your blog! I've only just "met" you online but am thinking about you. You are a strong woman to write about your struggles.
ReplyDeleteThey may be different, but when you talk about the amount of drugs it would take to take a forever sleep, red flags go up. You may not have meant it the way it came across, but you need to understand that a lot of us care for you, and don't want you hurt. We were worried about you,and making comments like you did when you didn't intend for them to be that way are wrong, and make a lot of people hurt.
ReplyDeleteNicole, I don't think you understood the whole point behind this post:
ReplyDeleteIn our actions, we, suffering from bipolar disorder, are not trying to hurt others. Most often the person getting hurt is us. We say things in the heat of the moment that we regret later. At the time, they feel right.
Mental illness blurs the line sometimes and makes us somewhat irrational. We don't feel great about those episodes, believe me. They make us feel like we are less than, and that we are destined to be miserable, not to mention not worthy of love.
I don't think this is the right time to be telling Pamela off. Rather, she needs understanding and to know that she is not alone. That others have struggled with the same issues she struggles with, are empathetic and care.
I know you mean well, but sometimes well meaning loved ones don't realize the damage their words can cause.
Pamela, I'm glad to see you haven't left the blog, and hoping that you are feeling better. I'm thinking about you.
Thinking about you no matter what... :)
ReplyDeletejust wanted to drop in and say hi. glad to see you are writing here. your blog has always been a fav of mine. but last week, i thought about you. during my 'normal' day. i thought about you. and i wished i could just sit down and have a cup of coffee. and visit. you see, that normal day? it was at the appt for my daughter. her psych appt. the one where they told me 'well ma'am at this age it is hard to know whether it is general psychosis, multiple personality disorder or schizophrenia.' the clencher...she is 6. just six. we were there because she has been hearing voices. voices that tell her she wants to get a knife and cut herself. she. is. six. my heart hurt so much for her. and in that hurting i thought of you. of how strong you are. and how much this blog and your others have given hope to so many. to me. so that in that time, when others would have fallen apart, i just simply thought. oh hey. i have support. i have a shitton of support. because i got this.
ReplyDeleteso thank you.